"You're the least needy woman I've ever met. That's awesome! No guy's gonna say "Who's your daddy?" to Robin Scherbatsky; you're your own daddy. And mommy. And weird survivalist uncle who lives in a cabin with a shotgun blaming stuff on the government. And that is what makes you the most amazing, strong, independent woman I've ever banged."
Barney to Robin in the Baby Talk episode of How I Met Your Mother
For a long time people always looked after me. Seriously. I got adopted like a kitten and fed and looked after by so many people and then when I was about 21 that stopped.
I'm trying to figure out if people stopped taking care of me, or if I realised I had to take care of myself. I still can't remember what came first. I think once you can do it for yourself people stop doing it for you? I'm not sure but I do feel more capable these days and wonder if I project that (in my scruffy nearly but not quite dropping things on the floor as I go kind of way).
I think that is why when I have to fix myself when things go wrong I sometimes resent it and get annoyed before I then set out to do all the hard work I need to do to get the situation under control but I do get ridiculously angry when I realise a situation is only going to get better if I change it. Then, if I can, I change it.
I worried that made me somehow weird and then saw the Baby Talk episode of How I Met Your Mother again and realised that it is part of being a woman and not a little girl and that it was okay.
So there you have it - learning through watching TV. Excellent stuff.
I'm sad to say that more reflective posts like this might be coming up as I look back a little in advance of my 30th birthday. I'm completely stoked for my thirties though. I reckon they're going to be all kinds of interesting and fun and challenging and all round ace.